well the good news is that even though that last posting was hard to write.....admitting all that stuff seems to have helped me. i feel much better today. it's almost like a weight has been lifted off of me. it seems like whenever something is bothering me that if i don't acknowledge it that it will just fester. then i will get all stressed and freak out until one day when i finally admit that things are bothering me then i feel so much better. so don't get me wrong.....all of those things are still bugging me but now i am dealing with them instead of ignoring them.

there is a guy coming in from New Zealand today. actually he arrived last night but stayed at a hostel. didn't know we had one in chicago. i am entertaining him for the next 2 days. should be interesting. he seems cool on the phone. i am taking him to green dolphin street tonight then to jody's bday party tomorrow night. hopefully by then, someone else can put him up for a night or 2. because mom and dad are visiting this weekend and won't have room for him to stay with me.